Sh!t I Learned in the Trenches

Lauryn Hill said it best: "Loving you is like a battle, and we both end up with scars." When it comes to this love-and-pain shit, baby, I've earned my stripes. I've endured heartbreak after heartbreak, enough to be a general in the army of the brokenhearted. I'm bruised, but still standing. And these scars don't just fade-they imprint. My scars are battle wounds. The truth is, heartbreak activates the same parts of the brain as physical pain. Even science proves it! That's why it feels like your chest caves in- like you can't breathe, like you might not survive. Here's the truth nobody told us: repeated emotional injuries alter how we perceive love. They alter our behaviors, change how we connect with others, and in the worst cases, make us fear love itself. Yes, you can have a trauma response to love! You can flinch at intimacy the way a soldier flinches at gunfire, because your nervous system has learned to equate closeness with danger. That's what I call Relationship Traumatic Stress Syndrome (RTSS). And whether we admit it or not, too many of us are walking around with it. This book is my war journal-my story of fighting through the trenches of toxic love, attachment wounds, betrayal, and self-sabotage. But it's also a survival manual for anyone who has been drafted into this same war. Because the real battle? It isn't against the people who hurt us. It's against the fears, thoughts, and patterns we've internalized along the way. This is a war of the mind, a war for the heart, a war for your peace. Inside these pages, you'll discover: How trauma disguises itself as "love" Why heartbreak feels like physical pain in the brain and body What RTSS looks like in real time-and how to know if you're carrying it Survival strategies to stop the cycle of self-sabotage A path toward healing, wholeness, and loving safely again You are not broken. You are not weak. You are a soldier, bruised but unbowed. And now, it's time to stop fighting blind. It's time to suit up with strategy, reclaim your power, and finally win the war within.